Once upon a time, it was easy to pretend that navigating the pot conversation with tweens and teens was as simple as telling them "Don't do drugs" and then hoping for the best. Although that DARE-inspired approach may have worked on some kids (and likely didn't on lots of others), smart moms know that the conversation around marijuana is a lot more complicated these days, especially as weed has become increasingly legalized in the last 10 years.
Even though marijuana is still illegal in all states for use by minors, we also know that vaping has been on the rise and kids are using social media apps such as Snapchat to find access to other forms of the drug, including edibles. Regardless of how a parent may feel about their own use of weed, the truth is we all still need to talk to our kids about staying safe. So, we turned to the experts: real moms, including those who indulge in weed themselves, in states where marijuana is legal, who gave us the scoop on how they are having conversations about pot with their teens.
More from CafeMom: 5 Signs Your Kid Is 'Vaping'
Buy it Safely
"Actually, since it’s legal, I tell my kids when they become of age that if they want to partake, they should buy it themselves from a legal dispensary as opposed to just trusting some random friend. I have heard that some street pot can be laced with fentanyl, so I’d rather them not do that. Oh and definitely we need the talk about not driving while using any substance at all." — Laura K., California
Safety, Not Abstinence
"Our opinion on weed has always been pretty liberal. We smoked plenty of it when we were young and it wasn’t legal! We’re focusing more on safety than abstinence since it is legal here and I don’t expect them to never try it. Not gonna lie, I still smoke too, so I'll be there to help them buy it safely when the time comes." — Lisa F., Oregon
Still Illegal for Them
"Pot being legal isn’t changing the conversation for us. It is still illegal until she is 21, just like alcohol, so it’s still a ‘Don’t do it until you can do it legally’ message from us, which means the expectation is still that they don't do it in high school.” — Janet J., California
More from CafeMom: Parents Outraged Over High School Yearbook Pages Dedicated to Sex & Alcohol
Legal Here Isn't Legal Everywhere
"My daughter's dream is to work for the CIA or FBI (I blame too many episodes of Criminal Minds) so I have had the conversation with her that just because pot is legal in our state, it still isn't legal everywhere and that she will need to be careful about drug tests in the future if she works for a federal agency. It won't truly be legal until it is legal at the federal level." — Constance Y., Minnesota
Don't Take Candy From Strangers
"I have young kids, 7 & 4 and I’ve had discussions with my 7yr old about not eating candy given to him at school. I feel like most adults around here use edibles if they use anything and so I assume at this age this is how he would accidentally ingest it. I know we’ll have to have more in-depth conversations as he gets older." — Kim P., Colorado
Vaping Is Popular
"I live in a state where weed is legal and has been for awhile. My conversations haven’t changed as my son is 17 so still illegal for him, however ever since he was a freshman in high school weed has been readily available…vapes are the most popular. I asked my son while in high school where his friends get weed from & he said most get it from the parents! So I do think with it becoming legal, it maybe did have an effect on parents sharing more with their kids." — Anna R., California
Hiding My Stash
"Weed just became legal here so we're figuring out how, if at all, the conversation changes for us. I do consume edibles and have always kept my stash hidden. I'm still deciding if I want to get more open about my use now that it isn't illegal or if I should keep hiding it to reduce the odds that my 14 year old ever tries to sneak some for himself." — Sarah F., Minnesota
Weed Is So Easy To Get
"Mom of 19 and 17 year old. We are in Washington, second state to legalize. It's easier to get than alcohol, so a definite problem. The kids can get it delivered to their house via Snapchat, their connections advertise and are mobile. I swear college kids are making a killing driving around selling it to high schoolers.
"You pretty much smell it 24/7 throughout the city of Seattle. And the THC carts the kids vape hardly even smell at all, so they are popular favorites for the school bathrooms. I'm still trying to talk to them about why it is better for their brains to not partake until their brains are done developing, but I'm not sure if it's working or not." — Bonnie W., Washington
More from CafeMom: Parents Give Daughter a Weed-Inspired Name & No One Can Decide If They Love It or Hate It
Use It Responsibly
"Weed has been legal for a while here now, but my daughter (who’s 20) grew up knowing that I believed it should be legal and that its criminalization has been used to target certain populations. I always told her it was the same as alcohol; fine when used responsibly, which is easier to do as an adult. She uses it now and it doesn’t bother me, she doesn’t care for drinking and she’s not a 'partier' at all." — Amanda B., New York
Protect Your Brain
"I'm fully supportive of the decriminalization of marijuana from a criminal and social justice perspective. But, as a doctor, I do want my own kids and the teens I treat to understand that pot isn't just a harmless thing. Regular use of marijuana is not good for brains that aren't fully cooked yet and smoking ANYTHING isn't great for your body. I don't want them to think legal means harmless." — Nicole B., New Hampshire
Other People's Parents
"Honestly, the hardest part of navigating weed stuff now that it is legal here is dealing with the fact that it is just SO MUCH EASIER for teens to get weed than it was before. Parents: Please pay attention to your edibles. As a teacher, I see kids who are high at school every single day and it is because they are taking edibles they find at home." — Mattie C., Arizona
Mental Health Worries
"My 14 yr old has pretty significant issues with anxiety and depression. One thing that both we and his counselor have talked to him about is that weed can make mental health stuff worse for some people, so he needs to be careful about that, even when he gets old enough to legally purchase it." — Jackie B., Minnesota
Remember the Goal
"My son's biggest dream in life is to play soccer in college and going pro someday. A lot of our conversations about things like drugs or drinking is to remind him that doing things like that, even if it is legal, aren't going to help him be the best athlete he can be. So far, I think it is working. He is really thoughtful about what he puts in his body in a way I hope will keep him from doing something stupid." — Sara K., Colorado
Safer Substances
"I will get TOTALLY judged for saying this, but whatever. When my kid gets into high school, I plan to tell them that if they want to try weed, I'll get it for them. Kids experiment and there is some scary stuff out there. If he's gonna do it, I want to make sure he has safer substances." — Name withheld by request
Still Just Saying No
"The conversation hasn't changed for us. Our religion forbids drinking, smoking, drugs, all of it. Just because something is legal, doesn't make it right and our expectation for all of our kids is that they follow our faith, not the law." — Ellie C., Colorado
*Disclaimer: The advice on CafeMom.com is not a substitute for consultation with a medical professional or treatment for a specific condition. You should not use this information to diagnose or treat a health problem without consulting a qualified professional. Please contact your health-care provider with questions and concerns.
